How many times have just suddenly clicked with someone, the conversation is flowing and there seems to be a high level of connection between you, you may have even commented to someone else about the connection you have with this person. I fact you may have said, “we talk the same language”. If you are indeed speaking the same language, then what do we mean, and what is it which makes us connect better with some people better than others.

One of these reasons is the simple fact in the way we communicate and how that communication is perceived. To keep this simple lets look at the 3 main way in which we communicate, linguistically.

These are called Representational Systems or Predicate Preferences

Visual –  This means the communication will be delivered with a visual element. i.e “I see what you mean” “I get the picture”

Auditory – This communication is delivered with a auditory slant. i.e. “I hear what you’re saying” “Listen, when I say x you do Y”

Kinaesthetic – This means the communication will have a touchy feeley slant. i.e. “Hold on for a moment” “I’m getting a grasp of this now”

How to use this to gain a better line of communication.

Te first and most important rule is to simply find out what the other person is using, which REP System do they tend to lean towards. Once you have a clear idea from a certain person you can really make sense to them, hold their attention and really allow them to listen and understand. Creating a strong level of communication is so essential and this is really one of the easiest ways to do this. The eal beauty of this is that it will go undiscovered and the person you are talking with will just feel more comfortable. After all. making people feel comfortable within your space is only a good thing surly.

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